Called to serve: five voices on the journey to ordination

Dirk De Neve

To be ordained deacon — NSM Distinctive Deacon, Swansea Ministry Area

Dirk De Neve is 69 years old, originally from Belgium, and worships at Clyne in Swansea. On 27 June he will be ordained as a distinctive deacon, serving in the Swansea Ministry Area — meaning he will remain permanently in the diaconate rather than proceeding to priesthood.

Dirk says he found a home in the Anglican Church when he moved to Wales after marrying his Welsh wife, but first felt a sense of calling at a young age.

"I had a calling when I was 17, 18 — but because I'm from Belgium, it was the Roman Catholic Church, and I didn't really see how it was going further. I didn't do anything about it.

"I met my wife, who was Welsh, came over to Wales, married here, and she went to the local Anglican Church, and I really found myself at home there. People were friendly, I got involved in everything — being an acolyte, being a member of the PCC."

It was his wife who eventually encouraged him to explore the calling further.

"Even though I felt something, it was my wife who talked to me about it. She said: Dirk, don't you think you have a calling? And we went from there."

Training, he says, brought its own challenges for someone whose first language is not English.

"I had to start writing essays in English, talking in English. It was a little bit difficult. But I had a lot of support from God, and from all the people around me — so much support from my congregation, who helped me with everything."

Dirk will remain permanently in the diaconate as a distinctive deacon, and has a clear sense of what that means.

"The deacon is a person who stands in the doorway of the church. He looks outside, into the world, into the community, to talk to people, to help people. But when he looks around, he still has the church behind him — for his spiritual health, for the sacraments, for communion.

"What I'm most looking forward to is going into the community and showing people what Christians are — not only by word, but by how you actually are. That Jesus is love, and spreading that love among people. It's like sowing seeds. You sow those seeds, and hopefully they grow."

Vicky Claridge

To be ordained priest — Stipendiary Curate, Irfon, Edw and Wye and West Radnor Ministry Areas

Vicky Claridge has served as a deacon in the Irfon, Edw and Wye and West Radnor Ministry Areas for the past year. On 27 June she will be ordained priest — though she describes her journey to this point as anything but straightforward.

"When I was initially called by God into ministry, I did everything I could to avoid it, to not acknowledge it. I believed there were far better people than me to do this for God. But it soon became evident that this was God's will — this was what God wanted from me."

The deacon year, she says, has meant learning to trust in a new way.

"I've had to trust in God on a daily basis, being on the ground amongst people, amongst communities, as a servant of God. I already knew this, but I've learned it this year in a new way: I can't do any of this through my own strength. It has to be done through the strength, love, and grace of God — which is very comforting and reassuring, but equally very scary."

Prayer and scripture, she says, have been central to that.

"I find myself talking to God throughout the day — the daily offices, reading scripture. I'm always amazed that whatever is going on in life, in ministry, I can read the scriptures and God will speak right into whatever's going on at that time."

That change, she says, has gone deeper than she expected.

"I've had to dig deep, to develop a real sense of self-awareness and emotional maturity, and hold myself accountable. What's come from that is a courage to trust in God, over and over again. I've become confident — not in myself, but in what God is doing through me.

"I hope what people will experience in me is a person who has said yes — here I am, God. And I hope that witness may give other people the courage, the conviction, and the strength to answer God's call, whatever that may look like."

Rhodri Williams

To be ordained deacon — NSM Curate, Brecon and Epynt Ministry Area

Rhodri Williams is 33, originally from Pontarddulais, and now lives in Brecon with his wife Rachel and daughter Anwen. He holds a PhD in Church Music Composition and a Diploma in Clinical and Pastoral Counselling, works full-time for the Welsh Ambulance Service as an Emergency Ambulance Practitioner, and is a founding member of the Anglican Greyfriars, a dispersed Franciscan order. He trained part-time at St Padarn's Institute and will be ordained deacon on 27 June, serving his curacy in the communities of Llanfaes, Llandefaelog, Merthyr Cynog, and Aberyscir.

Rhodri has been exploring a sense of vocation since 2013, while working as an Emergency Ambulance Practitioner and singing with Derby Cathedral Choir.

"I don't think there was one dramatic moment, so much as a long, stubborn accumulation of grace."

Then, in 2017, while rehearsing with Derby Cathedral Choir, something shifted.

"I was rehearsing the Magnificat from Herbert Howells' Collegium Regale with Derby Cathedral Choir, and I felt an immense warmth — a sense of being directed to the altar rather than confined to the choir stalls. After that, I couldn't say no, because God seemed to keep appearing in the places I was already standing: in the Daily Office, at the altar, in deprived urban and rural churches, in conversations with people carrying grief or hope, and in the back of an ambulance at three in the morning."

Working at the sharp end of emergency care, he says, has given him a particular perspective on where people encounter God.

"My work with the ambulance service has taught me that people often meet God at the raw edges of life, whether or not they have the language for it. Coupled with my own experience of neurodivergence and living with bipolar disorder, my understanding of vocation has been reinforced with the realisation that God's grace is not reserved for the tidy, the polished, or the conventionally straightforward. God calls whole people — in their entire giftedness, complexity, woundedness, and belovedness."

He trained part-time at St Padarn's while continuing to work shifts and raise a family with Rachel and Anwen.

"The journey has been equal parts demanding, joyful, exhausting, funny, holy, and revelatory — and more than occasionally held together by cheap coffee, coarse language, and the grace of God. It hasn't always been tidy, and it certainly hasn't been easy. But discipleship rarely is."

Rhodri describes the deacon's role as that of a "holy nuisance".

"For me, a deacon stands at thresholds: between the altar and the street, the Church and the secular world, worship and service. The heart of the diaconate is to make visible the servant Christ. A deacon proclaims the Gospel — not only from the lectern, but through a life turned outwards towards the poor, the weary, the forgotten, and the wounded. A deacon reminds the Church that the Eucharist does not end with 'Go in peace' — rather, its embodiment in the world begins there.

"The Church shouldn't only welcome people when they've managed to make themselves acceptable; it should recognise Christ already present in the complicated holiness of real human lives. A deacon is called to be a holy nuisance in the best possible sense — someone who keeps asking whether our prayer is becoming mercy, whether our worship is becoming justice, and whether the people beyond the church door know they are loved by God."

For anyone thinking of exploring a calling, his advice is to "pay attention to the holy restlessness".

"Don't panic — which is always easier said than done. Don't assume that God only calls people who are uncomplicated, endlessly confident, or serenely organised. Scripture rather suggests the opposite. God has a long and occasionally alarming habit of calling people with questions, wounds, hesitations, and unfinished stories.

"Pay attention to the holy restlessness. God's call isn't always loud or obvious; sometimes it is a repeated tug, a question that won't go away, or others recognising something in you before you can see it yourself. Talk to wise, prayerful people. Be honest about your doubts, your fears, your gifts, and your wounds — with yourself as much as with others. You don't need to arrive fully formed. God doesn't call perfect people. God calls real people, and then patiently, lovingly, and sometimes infuriatingly, forms them.

"Vocation is not about status — it is about love. The question isn't, am I good enough? It's: can I take the next, small, faithful step? So often, that is where the call begins."

Lizbeth Matthews

To be ordained priest — NSM Curate, Brecon and Epynt Ministry Area

Lizbeth Matthews farms in the Brecon and Epynt Ministry Area, where she has been serving as a deacon for the past year across a cluster of six churches. She will be ordained priest on 27 June.

Lizbeth says the most important thing the deacon year has taught her is to be present.

"The thing I have learned most over this last year is to be present. To be present within the community. To notice what's going on, to listen — even when people don't think they're talking to you. That's something I need to take into my role as a priest: to be present wherever people are, so that they know I am there for them."

The year has taken her from school assemblies to funerals across six churches.

"Before I started this journey, I felt called quite strongly towards women and children, and that has proved to be true. I do a lot of children's work — going into local schools, taking Open the Book, opening up Bible stories so that children can take something from them. But I also really enjoy our midweek communion, when there's just a group of older ladies and we can relax together with God and talk things through.

"Life has become a lot busier, because I've been taking up more and more opportunities to meet people. Unfortunately, I've had quite a lot of funerals, but this has meant I've made more connections within the community — and it's been really good to get to know more of what is happening around me."

Something she had not anticipated was how others around her would grow.

"One of the unexpected things this year has been the way other members of our congregations have grown in their faith and in their own ministry. Whereas I started this year just myself and my ministry area leader, we now have a team of worship leaders and pastoral visitors. It would be so wonderful if that growth in lay leadership continues."

Looking ahead to life as a priest, she returns to the theme of presence.

"Hopefully, when I am a priest and I meet people, I hope that people will know that I am there for them — wherever they are in this world that can be totally overwhelming."

Bashir Masih Gill

To be ordained deacon — Stipendiary Curate, Afon Tawe Ministry Area

Bashir Masih Gill spent three years as churchwarden at St Mary's, Swansea Minster before training at St Padarn's Institute. A former teacher, he will be ordained deacon on 27 June and serve his curacy in the Afon Tawe Ministry Area.

Bashir says his sense of vocation has been the foundation of everything.

"A sense of calling, of vocation, is very important to me. Without calling, without vocation, we can't serve properly. That is what God made me to be: His servant, leading people toward God."

Two years at St Padarn's, he says, gave him both the knowledge and the courage to put that calling into practice.

"It gave me new directions, flourished my knowledge, and especially gave me more courage to meet people. My journey as an ordinand was marvellous — there were challenges, but I met new people and I learned a lot."

His background as a teacher shapes where he feels most called to serve.

"Because I was a teacher by profession, I would love to go into schools — primary schools, working with young people. But above all, my passion is to meet people and convey the message of Christ, the message of salvation, the message of comfort, the message of love. That is my main focus."

For anyone exploring a calling, his advice is to pray.

"I will tell them honestly what ministry is all about — it is about serving others, helping others. And I will ask them to pray. Prayer changes things. The first step is simply to want to know. Then: try to discover yourself. Try to know your calling. If we have a calling, nobody can stop it."